On Birth Mother Day...A Letter to Bruik's Mommy

 

On Birthmother Day today, I wish to honor the Mommy of Bruik.
Bruik and I think and dream of his mother, who now lives in Heaven, with much love. Often he speaks of her before he goes to sleep.
A letter to Bruik's Mommy for Mother's Day:
Dear One,
Do you know the first thing Bruik wants to do, right after he meets Jesus? He wants to see you and his Daddy and fall into your arms.
As a Mama who has lost babies,knowing they live where you also are,I know the ache of separation of being apart from your child. Perhaps your emotion is not ache, since where you live, all things are made right? Do you understand better than I that we shall all be reunited in just a moment, in the grand story of forever??...But I know you pray, you yearn, you are waiting for Bruik as I wait for my babies.

We WAIT...and we LOVE...until...

Many times, as I am rocking Bruik or playing with him, especially in those times when I am reading a book to him, and his sweet curly head is resting heavy on my shoulder, I picture YOU holding my little baby boy and girl as they wait for me, while I get to love on your Bruik here on Earth.

It's a holy exchange of love.

A Sacred entrustment to love your child as my very own. And this love connects me to you.
I see your beauty in his handsome face, pouring through long eyelashes in soulful eyes.
I feel your joy in his quick joy and when he spontaneously starts to jump up and down or to dance with such passion and talent--he surely did not receive that from this mama!!
I sense the pride you feel for this one...as he darts with such skill down soccer fields and runs like a gazelle in the backyard.
I sense your patience and your laid-back ways in his gentle movements among our large family group. He settles us with qualities brought from your family tree.
I know you are pleased with his kindness, with what a loving and caring, and obedient, and pleasing son he is.
And do you see this photo of him this year? I know you loved him like this. I can FEEL it in his embrace...I can SEE it as he scoops up other little ones to love them with natural nurture.
And you know, I have made a covenant love promise before God to love your son in just this way...
Sweet lady.... Mrs. Adama, YOU have become my family..my VERY OWN. Just like "blood kin" to me. And on that day when we all see Jesus...I too want to quickly find you...I will be close in line, after Bruik gets his love greeting in, to hug your neck and say, "Thank you."...."I love you." You are family to me...forever.

Love Always,

Gillian

And here is our story of another woman so DEAR to our hearts, Ava's birth mother. This story was written soon after we traveled home from Ethiopia. How she fills my heart every my heart leaps for joy over our precious "sparkle bug", Ava (Rekeb) Aday.
Ava's Mommy's Story 

 Please keep us in your prayers as we will be meeting the birthmother of our newest baby to join our family on Tuesday evening. We so look forward to knowing her, to loving her well.
Blessings!! 

Happy Birthday, Bruik!!

Happy Birthday to Bruik!!

Bruik has greeted the day today with "B" shaped pancakes and dancing with YELLOW (favorite color) crepe paper streamers after breakfast to chipmunk music ;)

--a fav. with the six year-olds in the house!!

We'll be making our way to Jump Zone and then the pool for a pool-side family birthday celebration. :)

Bruik, you bring us great JOY!

Bruik is giving, kind and a very loving,obedient son.

He's Jack's buddy,
Ava's example,
Daddy and Mommy's sweet companion,

And a delight to us all!

God has blessed Bruik with a bright mind that is learning to read and loves to create ALL sorts of wonderful magenet block and lego creations.

He also has been physically gifted--he is beautiful in action in any Sport!


Bruik has a sweet friendship with God. His prayers are such an example of simple conversing with a loving Father. Bruik has SUCH a real and tender love for God's Word (the Bible). He often asks to read with us. At night he snuggles with the Word either close by or in his arms. He trusts the Holy Spirit's power and can be the first to lay hands on the sick in our family or to trust in God's provision for us.

We see the light of Jesus shining on your precious life, Bruiky!




This is the blessing Bruik, our "Gift of God" has us sing over him each night. (his name means, "Gift of God"--see our post on the miracle of how his name came to be under this post in the labels--"naming Bruik") I just looked the blessing up--it is from Numbers 6:24-26 --it actually is the priestly blessing God told Moses to teach to Aaron to say over the Israelites.

Very fitting for this child who's heart beats after God.
Would you please pray these verses with us today for Bruik?...


The Lord said to Moses, “Tell Aaron and his sons, ‘This is how you are to bless the Israelites. Say to them:

“‘“The Lord bless you

and keep you;

the Lord make his face shine upon you

and be gracious to you;

the Lord turn his face toward you

and give you peace.”’

“So they will put my name on the Israelites, and I will bless them.”

Love, Gillian

Springtime Nestyness

Spring has sprung!! This morning as I was emptying the dishwasher for the first of many times today ;) I heard a rustling sound in my garage--as I opened the door i found a little sparrow busying herself in my camping equipment box with bits of fluff, mud, and grass--getting ready for a springtime blessings. I can't wait to see her babies! I'm doing my own rustling around here. Mama bird, you're not alone!! And thus are the inspiration for the egg in the nest on our painted shirts....and got out the sewing machine to sew little dresses (we'll show and tell that later!)...whipping up cookies and are having lemonade sales...just living and playing out of doors...laying in the pool of sun on our trampoline...singing our hearts out and writing new songs...cooking lighter and with more bright veggies...checking all the garden beds for signs of my little friends in there--checking for tender green signs of life...you know, its SPRING!!

What is it about the seasons--how a simple change of light and breeze can lift the spirits so. Perhaps that we are made for light, made in love by the one who IS LOVE to respond to new life--always searching for what IS Light, what IS Life...we resonate with renewal--life springing forth after a cold season in which growth was slow and hidden--in which all that once was alive and green had folded up and fallen away... dry branches the only evidence of former life... wrapped in shades of quiet grey . Made in this way so we so naturally would "get" the unfolding story of the renewal and restoration that He made at the cross for us.



"Spring" actually began a bit early for the Tuckers this year and we have lots of praise reports to share--up coming this week. Just living and experiencing the reality of the newness that comes as we press into Jesus. (so available in any season of our lives!) "Behold I am creating something new, can you not perceive it?"
We look forward to sharing alot of JOY with you this week!
Enjoy the sunshine, everyone, AND especially delight in the ONE who made it all out there!!

Love, Gillian

The Dream

Today our little Bruik--affectionately known as, "Bruiky" or "Bruiky-mon" by our Daddy is a little under the weather. I get the snuggly privilege of holding him and bringing all the right sorts of treats that make little boys feel better--you know--fizzy drinks, snuggles in our favorite chair, treasured books, and just the right Tom and Jerry movie--I may not know the title but Bruik loves it by heart! His laugh is infectious even on a "sick day". I love resting my cheek on his soft curly head and pondering the wonderfulness of this beautiful boy.
I have blogged in the past about how the name we chose off of Ethiopian Name lists, Bruik, means, "Gift of God". Months later, when we received our referral for our little boy, we only received a couple photos which we carried in our pocket, put on the dashboard of our car, and showed to whoever we came in contact with--you know this well, adoptive families!! No videos or updates--just the bare bones-- but it was mystical and wonderful...and perfect for us. You see, the only other piece of information we received about Bruik was a faded copy of a form that was in Amharic and English translation. It had just a couple of informing details on it --no birth date-- but our little boy was healthy, details of how very tiny he was for his age, information that he was a true orphan-both parents deceased but that they had given consent before their deaths for him to be brought in to care--and something that immediately confirmed that this was our son--in the name space--out of all the names that could have been in that space--his given name was, BRUIK. His mama and papa in Ethiopia and his mommy and daddy in America ALL had chosen this special name for him. "Gift of God".
We have treasured our gift from God. How we are made for one another. What would we have been without his gentle ways? The way his pure heart just "gets" the Lord? The other day I cleaned his room. When he came back home and went up to his room he exclaimed, "Mommy, thank you!! You cleaned up my room with God's strength!"... Watching him play with his brothers and watch over his baby sister makes my heart both ache and beat at once. Often, when it is time for bed, after he is tickled by Daddy (a must!!) and we have prayed over him and spent time pondering how amazing the Lord is before he slips off to sleep, Richard will then bend over his ear, so perfectly nestled in all those soft curls, and whisper, "Bruik do you know who you are?" Bruik smiles and sleepily answers, "I am God's gift to you. or, "I am a gift." "Yes, you are God's gift to me" Daddy hugs back.
The other morning Bruik came downstairs very animated. "Mommy!!!DaaaDy (in his Ethiopian Accent)I had a dream!! After telling us his dream, he then told his brothers and sisters and shared about it for days--it must have been very real to him and very special--and we saw the fingerprints of God--and again got holy chill bumps as we listened to it. :)
"I had a dream. In it we were all in the living room. The whole family was there. Mommy and Daddy were there. In the middle of the floor was a big present. Daddy opened the present. He looked inside... And IT WAS ME!!!! I was the present!!!"
May God Bless you today as you love on your PRESENTS--or maybe long for a present from afar--blessings to you today. As for me, I'm off for another Bruiky snuggle!!

So Grateful,
Gillian

His Bundle on my Back--From my Ethiopian Journal

"He takes care of his flock like a shepherd.
He gathers the lambs in his arms.
He carries them close to his heart.
He gently leads those that have little ones. " (Isaiah 40:11)

African women carry their babies within long fabric pieces on their back. Like these children, as a child of God, since I was five, I have been securely wrapped up within the love of incredible Father God. First He saved me and simply asked me to love Him and to love others. To walk out my life as He did. He named this love, "adoption", as He wrapped me close to His heart. In time and by degree, He lovingly secured a bundle to my back as well. It is so much smaller but looks like the one my Father carries. I love to walk through His world with Him. Within this bundle He has placed Adoption , Rescue, Care for the Orphan--the desire to give place to the lonely--to set them in families--love for His hurting world. This, He has lovingly has wrapped to my back since I was a tiny girl. He has so much more to fit into my bundle. I gaze in there and marvel and wonder at its beauty -- the honor of carrying a likeness to my Father. Other times it has been very heavy to carry. But then, the gold of His Kingdom can be weighty.

I hope you can see her. She is my heart for adoption, for adoption in Ethiopia. A beautiful African woman stands with dignity under a brilliant, cobalt sky. She is dressed in humble garments and is wrapped in a long piece of colorful fabric. With skillful ease, she bends over gracefully to take the ends of the fabric. Seamlessly, she wraps the fabric over a baby on her back or front until the baby has the cosiest of perches to view the market before them. They walk down dusty streets, past baskets of food on blankets, among begging people with gentle eyes and past the man with withered polio legs dragging his torso to the injera stall (Ethiopian bread). Her baby blinks at the sun and is covered with a light shawl. She jostles to sleep, secured on her Mother's back. On they go through the aroma of Ethiopian "Boona"--the most delicious coffee you could ever imagine, around a young goatherd, coaxing his goats through the crowded, bustling market streets. Lilting music plays out of shanty-type one-room buildings covered in tin roofs lining the street, making up the market's stalls --this is the the vast "Merkato".

Her beauty belies the secret of her heart, greyer than the afternoon storm clouds that sweep across Addis Ababa each day at this time. The German medical lab has given her grave news. She is not the first of her family to receive such news--in fact she has watched all of her family members perish after similar reports. Some lived several years--others just weeks. Their arms--asleep in quiet graves--unable to help her. Unable to come to her aid. And no arms to receive her precious Rekeb. Rekeb, full of life and energy with the cry so loud and lively her Mama's name's meaning fits her well, "one who cries out". In different times there were many loving arms to soothe Rekeb's cries. She would have been passed around to bring Joy to every heart. In this land, there is no original word for "orphan" for children are the treasure of their family circles. Rekeb stirs in her cosy sleep, soon she will want to nurse. Who will feed her? Who will hold her? Will she live? Oh, God, help her, see my child. Let her live...
The mother reaches her destination, the outer wall of the local Orthodox church. She can hear the sound of singing. The daily services must not yet be over. She has heard this is a good place. Surely they will hear her. Will they? Or will the wild dogs who run the streets find her first? She shivers. She unwraps her incredible bundle and ...we do not watch the most private and excruciating of moments between a loving mother and child.

With the greatest of care she finds a gap under the wall and makes a bed of colorful fabric for her little one. Rekeb. Will she live? She stays, until Rekab's cries draw a crowd of street children. They pick her up. One older girl wraps her on her back ,in the colorful fabric. They speak of an orphanage not far away. A good place. She will live...

Across the world, my bundle comes to life! It is full, pregnant with a referral of two babies!! I sense the loving arms that brought these children to my Father even as I see their photos on my computer screen for the first moment and I love them even as love swells for these precious babies. Big brown eyes stare sadly at me from the first photo I open. It is a little boy, he is 2 years old. His parents are deceased. As we have nested we did what many parents do and have looked at Ethiopian name lists. We decided quickly and firmly months back upon the name, Bruik, meaning, "gift of God." I wrestle my eyes off of his photo to glean my first bit of information of my new son. And as I scroll down, I gasp and cry,shout and jump up and down--in Joy-- African woman-style!! His name, before me on the screen is...Bruik. Oh, my little son. Placed "on my back" and in my heart since I was a little girl...
The next image is a tiny little baby girl. Her velvet brown legs and arms are so thin they make me ache--with a mother's longing to tend and to nurture. Her cheeks are so kissable -- I can't stand it. Little...Rekab. Captivator of my heart---so dear to another that she was brought to my arms... I stumble around for weeks--dizzy with love and the closeness of the Father--soaring, sometimes staggering under the glory's weight.
Soon we are on a plane, watching a tiny electric airplane model on a map on the screen fly increasingly quickly away from my land. My daily world shrinks away...I turn toward the land of my new children.

There is no sleep for me, I toss in our hotel bed--tomorrow--we'll meet them tomorrow!! It is like the night before I was married--full of mystery, hope, and elation. My mind jumping to the future and savouring the present all at once.
I rearrange baby bibs and formula and tiny outfits and shoes. I pray and thank my Father. I lay out my" bundle" before me and tenderly consider it. Excited to further fill it tomorrow as we love on the orphans we meet and greet our babies for the first time.

On the following day we pile into a bright blue and white van and bump through the streets. We pull up to a walled orphanage and my stomach leaps, "Kids Care Orphanage" says the painted metal gate.

Bruik awaits us, dressed in a crisp oxford shirt and little blue sweat pants. We gently touch and hug. He smiles brightly and jumps into His Daddy's arms. Richard swings him up onto 6 foot 5 shoulders and Bruik looks triumphantly down at his new family.

Rekeb is waiting for us in a walker in the baby room. Her nannies say to me with laughing eyes, "you must pick out your baby now". Oh, no! I know the baby girl which I believe is mine...but she is the loveliest of all the babies in their white metal cribs--what if I am wrong and she is another? The joke is on me--I have hesitated too long. A nanny reaches down to the beautiful baby in the walker and secures her in my arms. I breathe her in. We sway to the musical sound of children's voices and Amharic speech. A first dance...

We drive away from the chorus of children but they remain still in our "bundles". How God presses them on our hearts.

We rename our Rekeb, Ava Aday, meaning, "breath of life, precious flower." She will live. Our Father.our Savior, has promised "life abundant" for her. And as we carry our children close to our hearts and walk through their lovely people, taking in their beautiful land,filled with pain, awe, and joy, we sense our Father, securing our bundles, walking beside us, sharing His heart with us...

Love, Gillian

Oh, Noodles!!

Now this really is a "slice" of our life here at the Tucker house :)

Check out video number three (to the right here) and I'll go wipe the noodles off the counter...and maybe off the boys?

Love,

Gillian